Trick or Treat

Halloween started out with a bit of a trick last night. I went to feed the fish, after the kids were in bed, and discovered that several had died. They'd been fine just a couple hours before then all the sudden... There were a few left alive so I decided to try and salvage them. I got them all scooped out into a bowl. I left the bowl on the counter while I cleaned out the fish tank. Apparently it was more than a certain striped feline could resist. Just as I was finishing the tank at the sink I heard *splash* I turned around to see the cat's tail darting behind the wall and the five remaining fish flopping around on the floor. Now I don't know about you, but touching fish is not my favorite thing to do, yet what else could I try? I scooped them back into the bowl, poured water in and hoped they made it through the night. I put them in a cupboard to avoid a third near-death experience in one day.

This morning I got everything set up again and amazingly, all five fish survived the night. Hopefully they'll make it over the next few days/weeks while the tank finishes cycling. Chasing fish is not my favorite activity - especially while they flop around the floor.

The cause of the second fish misadventure of last night, in his Halloween costume

The night went much better. I got Luigi and Star Wars Clone Trooper all dressed up and makeup applied. Little Man was insistent we drive into Tallahassee to Trick or Treat at the mall, so that's what we did. Beans was having a bit of an off day, a little cough, a little tummy trouble, so he wore his pump and we were thankful for his chair. There were several stores giving out candy, but it was enough to make the boys happy. :)


Little Man got a little overstimulated by all the people but he's made so much progress lately. When it got too much for him he shoved his candy bag into my hand and used his words to tell me he'd had it. We were able to find a quiet store to slip into while he calmed down. What an improvement! Instead of ruining the night it was one little blip.

On the drive home we were laughing our butts off. I can't even remember what was so funny but we had the best time cracking each other up. They're now properly sugared, bathed and teeth brushed so I suppose I should get them into bed. Little Man's nurse will be here soon and they're both still up. Happy Halloween!!!

Shower of Happiness

This last week and a half has had day after day of happiness. Sunday, the 11th, we went to my parents' house to celebrate Little Man's birthday. He was very possibly the happiest boy around. Grandma J helped him make gluten/dairy/soy free cupcakes. A great start to the visit for my chef-to-be. Grandma cooked a delicious dinner of salmon, vegis and a fabulous salad. Little Man was spoiled rotten with presents - his cooking set, a puzzle, some nice new clothes (yes, he actually likes new clothes), a Bionicle and his much hoped for RC helicopter. We all had a great time visiting and it really turned his birthday weekend from sad to happy. Thank you Grandma and Grandpa!

This past Saturday, the 17th, Little Man's school had their Fall Festival. He was chosen as his classroom representative for the coronation ceremony at the beginning. It was a very cute ceremony with each class representative's name being read off, them coming up on stage, bowing, receiving a medal recognizing them as the representative, then taking a seat in front of everyone. He did such an excellent job waiting his turn and then sitting quietly on stage while the ceremony finished. They even had little boutonnieres for the boys and bouquets for the girls.

Sunday brought another special day. It was the ceremony and reception for his guitar scholarship. Grandma and Grandpa came to watch Little Man perform and it made it all the more special. He was having a really bad tremor day, and the chair was too high, but he performed well nonetheless - and loved every minute of it! After several performed they had a big ceremony that he again sat quietly through! Then he got to go on stage when his name was called and receive his scholarship certificate. He was quite the proud Little Man.

On the way back to the car I took advantage of the men being dressed up and took this shot of my guys. Aren't they handsome?

And the final bit of good news this week - Little Man's personal care assistant was approved! Monday night the overnight aide started and tonight his evening aide is supposed to start. I got to sleep through the night, in my own bed, twice in a row for the first time in as long as I can remember. My patience level is already so much higher and I feel so great. It's weird getting used to someone being in the house, but I've accepted the fact I need help. I'm thankful for every hour someone can be here.

The Party That Wasn't

We had great plans for this party. Little Man was so excited. His first ever friends birthday party. When we lived in Utah he always had plenty of cousins to come to his party. This year we invited all four kids from his special ed class, hoping that at least one would come. No one RSVP'd, but when I called to RSVP for Beans for a party he was invited to at the same time, the parents were surprised that I'd called. I still hoped for the best.

We had the sign (which yes, will be taken down in a few days because of his name, but I had to share it with you for now at least)...we had the balloons, notice the LegoVille mylar balloon. It was his theme for the party. We had everything - plates, cups, placemats, tablecloth, favor boxes ...
we even had the pinata Little Man had his heart set on, and filled it with a boat load of candy.

The party was supposed to start at 3:00. At 3:30 no one had arrived yet. Little Man was having fun playing in the sand. He climbed on the playground for a while, threw sand on the slide and was rather enjoying himself. He had helped me hang the Happy Birthday sign and we'd set signs out around the park directing his friends to our pavilion.

I finally had to ask the dreaded question, "How long do you want to wait?" He said thirty minutes and I figured that was reasonable. He still wasn't phased that no one was there.

After 25 minutes I told him I needed to take the cake and ice cream to the car and he was okay with that, but when it hit 4:00 and I told him we should probably head home, reality finally set in that no one was coming to his party. :(

There's not much that's more heartbreaking for a mom than this face. :( I can't believe not one kid showed up. He was so excited for this party, he'd been waiting for weeks, his friends had told him they'd be there (although admittedly, no one RSVP'd) and his heart was crushed.

He was such a trooper though. He helped me get everything back to the car. I told him we'd take back the party favors we'd bought for his guests (Lego Racer cars) and buy something nice for him. All sadness was forgotten when he chose a Star Wars Clone Trooper voice-changing helmet.

One great thing about Little Man is he's all about living in the moment. If I brought it up, he'd still be sad, but it's over now and he's gone on with life.

I have to say I have the most amazing family. One little note on facebook, in a reply no less, that no one came to his party and they went into action. First Uncle C called, then Uncle J called, followed by Aunt S and Aunt H. It was so touching to see all my siblings calling my boy to make sure he knew he was loved and had a good birthday after all. Thank you guys! You are wonderful and I love you all!

Cougar of the Week!

Man it's been exciting around here lately! I'm almost afraid to pinch myself for fear I'll wake up from this dreamland of wonderness (like my new word?). Yesterday Beans hopped off the van from school just beaming. He had a paper clutched in his hand, but I couldn't see what it was from the doorway.

He bounced into the house, and I asked him the normal, "How was your day?" The smile erupted as his eyes beamed and he said he got Cougar of the Week! (Student of the Week) He's been hoping and hoping for this award since school started. As part of the award, he got to go on the school TV program that morning, got to choose a friend to eat lunch on stage in the cafeteria (he said he had a hard time choosing - he wanted to choose R and B and E and T, but he could only have one so he chose H - another amazing moment for me, He Has Friends!!!), and then he brought home his Cougar of the Week certificate.

I immediately hung the certificate on our board to honor him. Every time something like this happens - from the "smaller" ones of 100% on a spelling test, a new friend, who he played with at free time, to the bigger ones like Cougar of the Week - I sit back in awe. The little boy who used to hate people, who hid or screamed if they talked to him, who learned so much in preschool with the most amazing teachers ever, who backslid in kindergarten but has gone back to those skills he learned in the autistic school, has now launched. Nothing can stop him now and I sit back and realize how lucky we are.

Little Man's 10th Birthday

He had a great day! He woke in the morning and I let him open his gifts, unsure if it would cause more issues at school making him wait or letting him open them before he went. It turned out to be fine. :) He was so excited, full of big smiles all day.

At 2:00 I came to his classroom with cake. This was the first time I'd seen his class all together because usually I'm in classes when he is. Well it's quite obvious why he's so happy there - it's a class full of Little Man clones. Not in looks, but all five of those boys act the same, react the same and are hyper, rambunctious little cuties. He's among good company there.

Little Man while the class was singing to him

The boys sang him Happy Birthday and then we had cake. Or sort of did. Only two kids would eat it lol, and Little Man was not one of them. He's still getting over his cold so he didn't eat anything really for two days. I'm sure he'll make up for it at his party tomorrow. :)


We came home and Beans gave him his presents, followed by the sweetest birthday hug in the history of brothers. Little Man even let him do it and kind of hugged him back.


The evening was full of birthday wishing phone calls from almost the entire family. Every time the phone rang, someone was calling for him! All of his grandparents called, including those on his dad's side, his cousins called, and his aunts called. He went to bed one happy and content birthday boy. What more could we ask for?

A New Awareness

Little Man hasn't been feeling too well this week. He came home from school Monday with a horrible headache. He's been having bad joint pain as well. Things that would make anyone feel irritable. This afternoon he was miserable and started crying. He told me he was sorry he'd had bad feelings and bad choices this week. First of all, he hasn't been naughty at all. Second, anyone would be irritable if they felt like he does. But thirdly, this is a wonderful new awareness of his own behavior, feelings and choices! He's learning so much more than math and reading in his class, things I'm just amazed at.

On a little sadder note, some things were brought to light in Little Man's therapy recently that have been hard for me to accept. He has been through much more than I had imagined and has a lot to work through. He's been a very scared little boy for a very long time. I hate that someone who was supposed to love and protect him could hurt him so badly. He's making progress but he still has a long road ahead.

Tomorrow, though, is a day of celebration! Little Man will be celebrating his 10th birthday! We ordered the cake this weekend. I'll be picking it up on my way home from classes tomorrow and taking it straight to his class. He's having his first-ever friend's party on Saturday! He's so excited he can barely contain himself. Little Man, I hope you have the happiest, most wonderful day ever. You are such a blessing to me and I love you more than anything.

Before I go, I want to leave you with a couple pics from today. Nothing special, just little bits of happiness. Enjoy!

Busy Week and our First Applicant

Last week had a few bumps in it. Beans had his first sick day of the year - an absolutely amazing fact for a child with an immune deficiency. Think his teacher deserves an award for enforcing handwashing? I sure do. :D Having a bottle of hand sanitizer on your desk is the cool thing to do in his class. I love it. :D

Anyways, Beans sick day happened to fall on the day on my psychology test. You know - the no makeups for any reason test. I had no choice but to pack him along with me. He was so miserable he slept all the way to my school. I put him in his chair and his head hung back over the backrest and he slouched off to the side. I *really* need to get on his home health company about getting him something different. When he's feeling good he doesn't need to be in it at all, but when he's feeling bad this chair doesn't do the job. I had him hooked to his Farrell valve to vent his stomach (his way of throwing up and burping) while his feeding pump slowly pumped Pedialyte. I felt bad for having to drag him along.

I set him in the lobby, covered with a blanket and his backpack nearby in case he felt like playing with his toys, then went in to take my test. I rushed through it to hurry and get back to my little sickie bug. He did fine while I was testing so I decided to push my luck and see if I could make it to my next class - a review for another big test on Friday. No such luck. He was wilting like a flower and wasn't going to last. Before he started having bigger issues I decided to take him home. He again slept all the way home and was puny the rest of the day. (I've since bought him a new, more supportive car seat and he's much safer in the car. I couldn't imagine what would have happened had we been in a wreck when he was like this.)

Thursday he was back to normal so off to school he went. I'm not sure if he was actually sick or if it was just one of those Beans things.

Friday I got the unbelievable news that, for the first time in 10 years (!!), someone got 100% on my psychology professor's test. Yes, it was ME! Way to juggle school and parenting. :D Then I had to go take my sociology test. I was really worried about this one as the questions were worded strangely. No worries though, I found out Sunday that I got an A. :D Yay again!

Saturday was a big day around our house. The first applicant to be Little Man's PCA came over for an interview. Miss B looks like she's going to be a good fit. She has 3 boys of her own and is also in nursing school. She wants the overnight shift. I told her it actually should be pretty easy because when he wakes up she just has to keep him safe. There's no putting him back to bed when he wakes at odd hours so he can just play or whatever and she'll supervise. Her job will mainly be making sure he stays out of things that could hurt him, things he can hurt, and that he doesn't get out of the house. She's ready to start as soon as the authorization has gone through!

The timing couldn't have been better as Saturday, despite his newest increase of sleeping meds, Little Man had another night where he stayed up around the clock. This time though I had hope. Soon someone will be here to sit with him when he does this and I can still get my rest to deal with him and Beans during the day. I can't wait!