A Phone Call from School

The day was chugging along as normal. I finished my psychology class and was enjoying the break between classes. I checked my cell for messages and there was on from Little Man's school. *sigh* Last year I received multiple calls a week from his teachers but this was the first time this year. Of course, it's rarely a good thing when you receive one of these calls and today was no exception. Little Man was having a bad day. Tearing up papers, throwing things and yelling. His teacher said normally she'd just deal with it but she had to leave for an appointment and the parapro in the class couldn't deal with Little Man and the other students without her.

Instead of heading to my sociology class I had to walk right out the door and go pick him up. My first instinct in situations like this is punishment - and not light ones. On the drive to the school, however, his teacher, Ms. R, said she felt strongly that his behavior was due to the autism and a lack of ability to communicate rather than strictly a behavior issue. I told her that I'd felt the same but was having a hard time understanding how a child who is so verbal and with a normal IQ was unable to grasp simple concepts - asking for help, telling someone when he doesn't feel well, things like that.

Her answer both confirmed what I've felt in my heart, what I've read over the past few days in the studying on autism I've been doing, and what the testing he had done last spring showed in less articulate terms. Ms. R said it's called Little Professor Syndrome. Many autistic kids sound like they know just what they're talking about. They can echo back mounds of information and seem to be very with it. But, they don't understand. They don't really get things, their echoing is just that - parroting. Not showing a true understanding.

Besides that, they have an extremely hard time understanding social situations and even their own bodies. Their bodies are constantly changing, trying to process a bombarding world. The rest of us can filter out what we don't need but they can't. All that together and the world is a very confusing, frustrating place for our autistic ones.

All this led up to her saying that she felt kids shouldn't be punished for their behavior when it's not truly in their control. With Little Man, his behaviors are saying what his words can't. Normally this wouldn't have even been an issue and she wouldn't have called but since she had to leave she needed me to come pick him up.

Who would have thought that the frequent call I came to expect and dread would give me so much insight into my child? Once again I have such confirmation and confidence in his school placement. Instead of punishing my little guy for things out of his control, the focus is on helping him learn to recognize when he needs help or doesn't feel well and expressing his needs appropriately. Even in the class that I thought he was going into, and was upset when he wasn't placed in the "higher-functioning" class, he wouldn't have gotten this extra understanding and teaching that he needs. Sometimes things really do work out for the best.